Coming to an #appstore near you on 1 April 2013.
It was about time somone found a real solution to a real problem.
Panhandling has gone from a mild nuisance to American citizens to a major public order problem. So, we are announcing the first release of "The PanHandling App" for 1 April 2013.
As an American or a tourist, you have encountered panhandlers in all the good spots, be it Times Square in New York or Union Square in San Francisco.
And you know, this is America. Asking once just won't cut it.
Asking once is for quitters, on a date or when you panhandle.
Over here in Germany, it is still a bit different, once is still the norm, except in Berlin, but who cares about Berlin.
Like a clockwork orange, news reports come out every year around Christmas about panhandlers disturbing a polished, peaceful shopping experience.
"The PanHandling App" will solve this once and for all. As soon as a panhandler has panhandled enough money for a second or third hand (aka. stolen) IPhone or Android, he or she will be able to discreetly publish her or his location.
So the donors can find them, instead of all this on the sidewalk in your face stuff.
Whether you are a good-hearted office worker, a wealthy person or that great CEO called out in the earlier post "Christmas and the marginalized", you can just as discreetly summon panhandlers to a quiet alley in Atherton, CA, or Long Island, NY.
You can specify the total dollar amount you want to give and the maximum number of recipients. Panhandlers in turn will get into the virtual line (queue for you Brits), and you, the donor, can broadcast when the number has been reached. The whole location module is supported by Google Maps, otherwise you'd be "veräppelt"
Which means, your quiet alley won't be overrun by a Facebook style flash mob of the great unwashed.
Instead it will be a low key, almost solemn affair, where one person does good and the others get done.
Merry Christmas Bummer Bill.
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