Silly Saturday: Politicians & anti-ageing potions?

From our Silly Saturdays series.

There cannot be any doubt: while the rest of us are distracted by this or that real or imagined crisis and the daily quest for food, our politicians have managed to get their hands on anti-ageing medication that really works!

We are not talking botox because their faces still move. We are not talking human growth hormone either because the 5 foot shorty remains five feet tall -- we checked that by surreptitiously photobombing one of our locals over the course of five years.

The lower right hand corner ads in the free paper can be discounted, too. Vitamins and health supplements from the GTWhatever chain do not seem to have the effects we have observed. 

Baths of donkey milk or dolphin sperm are the stuff of old tales or adolescent imagination. Please refrain from picturing your favorite leader immersed in either.

A free lance member of the K-Landnews team, with whom we have since severed ties, suggested a less corrosive form of live embalming might be used.

Secret potions could explain it, but this is hard to evaluate because the Harry Potter books are stingy on real world recipes.

The fact of the matter is, we have not come up with a reasonable explanation. So, we put the question to our readers.

The most visible effect of the anti-ageing medication is the reversal of the subject's hair color to its natural tone, the second most visible sign is the smoothing out of wrinkles and the restoration of a healthy facial skin tone.

You can check the existence of the anti-ageing phenomenon for yourself by comparing election posters to minor newspaper photos of our leaders.

The main reason for assuming a secret formula is that it must be pretty rare still and quite expensive*. Lower ranking officials probably cannot afford to use it all the time, hence the difference in appearance on campaign posters and workday photos. Higher ranking officials do not display that stark difference often.

The local and state officials probably have to buy it from the national party org, or they get vouchers like the suit and dress vouchers you can read about in the news.

Again, this is all mere conjecture, which is why we ask you to provide any information you may have.

* Claims that outrageously high pensions for politicians serve in part to secure access to the meds or potion are likely overblown because the pension levels vary between countries.