Unhinged - first the door, then self: German marketing use of "terrorists, mercenaries, sympathizers"

The true test of adapting to a foreign culture is not mastering the language - that's overrated, a myth created by people who did not know better. And perpetuated by the German government since around ten or so years ago: must learn German to be allowed into the country if you hail from a developing country. Westerners get in and then need to learn.

In Japan, English became fashionable after the last lost war and when Japanese office workers realized the teachers were very often very cute Americans.

The true test is fixing a broken appliance or other feature in your new home.

We have stopped counting the number of trips to the home improvement/DIY store, but they probably rival the number of trips to the grocery store.

The other day, we hopped a few towns over to our favorite DIY store, the one with only 8% terrorists.

If you missed our tweets on this: German marketing folks have gone bananas.
Here is tweet number 4.
Don't believe they use "#terrorists", "#sympathizers", "#mercenaries" in #German #marketing?... http://www.marketing-boerse.de/Fachartikel/details/1320-Aus-Kunden-Fans-machen/42380 …

Anyhow, foreign DIY!

The good news is, the store layout is Western Bland International. Easy to find your way around. Much of the stuff is also the same, even inches are used for pipes and things.

Just when you think, oh, a breeze, it tends to get you. Door hinges did it this time around.

A guest room door had become unhinged. Years ago. It was like that when we moved in. After much planning and procrastinating, the blogster was browsing the Hardware, Hinges, Doors section.

The old hinges were weird. The part that goes on the door jamb had two eyes, one at the top, the other at the bottom for a bolt to slide in and hold the door counterpart in place. 

So, yes, you have two separate parts that slide into each other. Regular German doors between rooms have this swanky offset door design which precludes the American one-sies, the good quick Home Depot and ACE hardware hinges.

The American way:
Wedge door in place, put on hinge assembly, screw to jamb, screw to door, done.
Skill level: fresh off the boat.

The German way:
The German two-part or three-part assembly is much trickier to mount. The old style forces you to install the jamb parts and then fit the door pieces because the door pieces block the holes for the screws.


The newer designs at least have two of the screw holes moved onto a sort of tongue that extends beyond the pivot at the top and at the bottom. But the effing assembly is still in two parts, so what to do?
Skill level: the strength of a carpenter combined with the dexterity and the eye of a master jeweler.

The Germans have a good reason for the removable style: you may want to re-paint the door! And exactly when after the next 30 years?

Rest assured, both the door and the blogster are safely re-hinged, and we are looking forward to receiving guests without blushing when we explain the door thing.

The solution:
Duct tape, a small strip to temporarily hold the two pieces together. Then follow the steps under "American way".

Wouldn't it be nice if the manufacturers could hold the two pieces together with a plastic wrap and make a big innovation deal out of it?